Part One: Financially Helping Adult Children: When and How to Teach Independence
How do you help launch your adult child to financial independence? We’ve put together some tips for being the supportive parents you want to be, but at the same time, helping them have financially independent lives.
Four Step Process to Launch Your Child’s Financial Independence:
- Make Your Decision
Assess the monthly support you are providing and decide on when it is time to help your child become financially independent. Both parents should come to an agreement so they will have a united front when discussing this with your child. - Have a Family Meeting
Set up a time to meet together to discuss becoming financial independent and be prepared for the meeting. Make a list of all financial help that is being given – cell phones, insurance, car payments, etc. and the amount being paid. Discuss what your needs and expectations are and how you want them to be financially independent adults. Help them understand the impact the financial help has on you and that you are making real tradeoffs to support them. - Create a Written Plan With Dates
Create a game plan where responsibility for the bills is given over to the child. This can be mapped out to a zero outlay over time. If dates are included in the plan, the children will know what to expect. One gradual way to do this is to have an additional expense being taken over by them every four to six months. By writing the plan down, it will reduce any confusion. Specific information and dates will help everyone understand the plan. Consequences can also be included. - Be Prepared for Hiccups
There are going to be challenges and hiccups. Decide beforehand to which crisis you will respond. There will be health issues, bad bosses, car problems, and grandchildren needs. By deciding before you get those phone calls, you already know what your reaction will be and how much you are willing to help.
As you help your children transition towards financial independence, keep the communication channels open. Even when you’ve shut down the ‘Bank of Mom and Dad‘, having a financial coach can be helpful as children learn to manage their money and develop the tools they need to be financially independent and responsible adults.
As experienced wealth managers, Blankinship & Foster is trained in assisting with sensitive issues of this nature. If we can assist you, or anyone you know, with this type of challenge, please don’t hesitate to contact us.
